I am on the verge of trimming my bangs and certainly it will be a disaster. I need a distraction, just anything - and so I sit and write.
For the love month, I encourage all my friends to watch Alain de Botton's talk in Google even in London in 2017 - Why You Will Marry the Wrong Person.
It's been 2 days that I have been obsessing with it; had boss watch it with me again this morning.
And though I want to highlight all my favorite parts, it would just look like someone spilled the ink of the highlighter - yes I adore all parts of the talk, most were painstakingly accurate. But this maybe the point I relate to the most --
One of the reasons why love is so tricky for us because it requires us to do something we really don't want to do which is to approach another human being and say "I need you, I wouldn't really survive without you, I'm vulnerable before you"
..and there's a very strong impulse in all of us to be strong and to be well-defended and not to reveal our vulnerability
...whenever there's a danger of needing to be extremely vulnerable and exposed to another person ..the first response is to get "anxiously attached"..
When you are anxiously attached to somebody rather than saying "I need you", you start to get very procedural .. you start to get strict when actually what you want to do is to ask a very poignant question "Do you still care about me?"
Why do I feel attacked?! LOL
I kind of want to delve into this talk deeper; maybe do some self-reflection. I also kinda want to read his books but maybe another time.
Speaking of books, I wish to finish this James Patterson I'm reading now. There are so many cheesy parts/cliché-ish; it's making me wonder if his books had always been that way. And now I'm trying to recall which ones I've read before. Have I ever though?!
Anyway, I want to finish this one because I ordered a memoir and hope to finish that one as well before our company's virtual book club Bluejeans meeting. Yes, aside from Zoom, MS Teams, WebEx, there's yet another videoconferencing app called BlueJeans.
Over the past few weeks, I have managed to enjoy new normal a bit -- "eat out" (technically eat at the MAAX parking lot) with Team Gastritis, come home to GMA to visit Mommy, Daddy, & Tisoypie, and meet Simeon Fam, have dinner slash slightly awkward reunion with college friends, meet with highschool barkada (though for unfortunate circumstance), feel like a winner in purchasing affordable lemons, satisfy my cravings of padthai and ramen, and pickup "Plakpook" in Taguig [dear self, change this later].
2021 has been relatively good, it terrifies me a bit.
Photo dump coming right up -
something infiniteLy interesting
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